Happiness
Resources
Nick C Tweets on Happiness
Nick Cammarata tweet collection on happiness.
This thread chain is a fantastic entry point too, and talks about happiness, meditation, jhanas, IFS therapy, MDMA, psychedelics.
psychiatrists: there is a good chance with the right interventions you can reduce the amount of time you feel melancholic and blue
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) October 12, 2020
me: you are absolutely capable of feeling out of breath because the world is so intrinsically beautiful it's hard to remember to breath https://t.co/RGlXmyYJ9e
You are capable of needing to look away from the mirror when you brush your teeth because when you see your eyes you smile too much and your vibrating sonicare sends toothpaste flying everywhere
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) October 12, 2020
You are capable of laying on the ground sober staring into the stars feeling so connected to them you forget you are not a star too
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) October 12, 2020
And I actually do believe the inequality of how full of life you feel isn’t that far off the inequality in wealth. I think you can get to a point where each year of life is easily worth a decade of life prior. (Pic from the intro of an essay draft) pic.twitter.com/hKOFLNeS02
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) October 12, 2020
btw I know there’s nothing I can do to remove this perception, but I write on this subject a lot and it’s not to subtweet “I’m v happy”. You’re capable of being more happy and full of life than I’ve ever felt. I want that so much and you won’t get there if you don’t know you can
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) October 12, 2020
Every time I tell someone this it helps them a lot, and I do honestly believe it so I’ll just blanket say it for each of you
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) February 18, 2021
I think you’re likely radically underestimating the ceiling of what you’re capable of in basically every way, and I’d bet on it at a large multiple
- This entire thread is fantastic on dispelling common happiness myths
We shouldn’t just work towards anti-depressants but towards the opposite of depression
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) May 23, 2021
You can feel good and motivated almost all the time, just as some people feel bad / demotivated / dread almost the time. You don’t just adjust to a “new normal” https://t.co/dlnKc0eQ53
There’s also a few cultural beliefs that are just completely wrong:
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) May 23, 2021
1. You have to work hard to be happy. Idk where this comes from but this is what I’d say if I were a ruler or religion maker who wanted you to work without fair pay. It’s completely wrong
2. If you’re happy and motivated all the time you’ll be less ambitious, which seems ridiculous when you write the belief out explicitly. Depressed people struggle to get out in the bed, and don’t get much done. The opposite is obviously what you want if you want to do big things
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) May 23, 2021
3. Everyone experiences roughly the same thing. Depressed people think everyone is at least kind of depressed, temporarily manic people tend to think every part of the world is great. There’s a huge amount of natural variation and you can change what being alive feels like a ton
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) May 23, 2021
4. Every up must bring a crash. We imagine a story of someone who spends their money on a whim and then regretting it and wishing they were more responsible / thrifty ...
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) May 23, 2021
6. Most people reading this have heard of the “hedonic treadmill” but haven’t read any papers on it. It sounds scientific and close enough to the above beliefs that we put the scientifically validated stamp on them. But it’s not how the hedonic treadmill works https://t.co/LzAODYTtva
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) May 23, 2021
7. Happy people are loud about it
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) May 23, 2021
In reality chronically happy people usually feel guilty and are silent. Most loud people are fakers. How would you feel if everyone you met was chronically viscerally depressed? You’d feel like an alien, and you’d feel guilty
The people who suddenly become chronically happy don’t proudly announce it to everyone, they become confused and fear they have bipolar or schizophrenia or something else. They need comfort and to be understood. Everyone gaslights them, attacks them for feeling what is impossible
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) May 23, 2021
If you think your motivation comes from suffering and pain, try removing the pain just to check if it’s true. You can always add it back https://t.co/1In6R86ayZ
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) April 5, 2021
“You really can just wake up one morning & decide not to carry the pain anymore & you won't lose anything in the process.” https://t.co/HmmnbdXa4Y
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) April 5, 2021
For me it took way more than just waking up and deciding, but I don’t think it has to take so much work in principle
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) April 5, 2021
But even if it takes thousands of hours of prying at your own psychology, there’s a good chance the life waiting for you on the other side is worth it
my happiest friends are all impressed by everything all the time
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) February 15, 2021
there's a very strong correlation between "I'm proud I did X, I should show it to Y they'll be like wowowow" and Y being outlier happy
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) February 15, 2021
(they're often wowowow walking around all day in their life already, just impressed by everything around them)
also, they're generally crazy productive, which seems counter-intuitive. Maybe being in flow and not attacking yourself is far more important to productivity than being emotionally critical all the time (you can still give criticisms, but emotionally you're still impressed)
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) February 15, 2021
Heuristic for if you have self-love (that I’ve seen a bunch of people reach!): walking around alone feels kind of like walking with someone you have a crush on
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) October 5, 2020
(this from a QT thread from 6 months later)
I think it’s important that people not think of it as a permanent thing. Like any feeling it comes and goes. When people claim to get self-love then feel it 24/7 forever I’m a bit skeptical, because that’s just not how the “physics of emotions” works, and that’s okay
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) April 18, 2021(continuing on from original thread)
I’d also like to highlight (got a dm about this) that self love is not selfishness or narcissism. It’s literally just self + love. When you hold your baby and have unconditional compassion for them - it’s just that, but for yourself. It’s not about grandiosity
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) October 5, 2020
It’s also not self-care. Self love isnt taking a bath or doing your nails it’s just self + love and you can have it doing anything. Mothers still unconditional love their toddlers when they’re sick and poop everywhere
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) October 5, 2020
Basically, your mental model for thinking about getting self-love shouldn’t be taking a bath, it should be neurosurgery
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) October 5, 2020
I’d also add that the amount of energy you generate is mostly a function of unclogging internal physical and emotional blocks
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) May 29, 2021
You intake plenty of calories (energy) so if you’re low energy the well-spring inside you is blocked https://t.co/8mJsFHNdc7
I fully believe that if fully aligned most people would find they have more than enough energy for anything they want to do from the moment they wake up to the moment they go to bed
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) May 29, 2021
people who are happy basically all the time (hyperthymics) are way more productive than most people. When you’re in abundance / surplus mindset when it comes to mood you can lengthen your time horizons and work on the most important things
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) August 7, 2021
What’s the simplest explanation for:
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) January 24, 2021
1. Most people in the world are repulsed by the idea of working on tools for increasing happiness
2. If you ask basically anyone “would you like to be twice as happy” they immediately say yes
my current best guess is people who don’t actively feel happy this moment lose access to what it’s like. They imagine a sugar-high or being meh and trying to force feeling happy
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) January 24, 2021
If they could truly feel what A+ happy is really like they’d be that way right now by definition
As far as I can tell self-love requires experientially loosening your grasp on self, because you can’t love something without distance from it. But the gap can be small
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) February 17, 2021
This is why saying self-love is narcissism or being full-of-yourself isn’t just false it’s the wrong direction
if you have tragic internal narratives the good thing is you can change them
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) April 8, 2021
I think it usually takes working on it directly. Doing what the narratives want you to do (get more status etc) does sometimes work (stop the suffering), but it's a lot less reliable than going direct
You can get to a consistent ~0/10 anxiety, you can wake up every day for a year feeling excellent. If you think you can't because of some fundamental reason why you're broken the science is very against you and you're almost certainly wrong
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) April 8, 2021
Might take a lot of work though
- pulled out from the tweets above - some great responses in this particular thread
in particular, things like "I'm an anxious / sad / etc person" are super bad and almost certainly based on nothing. I was once anxious and talked to a psych and they're like "hm did you know it could be genetic??", caricaturely bad advice
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) April 8, 2021
okay but like Nick
— 🎀 sonya supposedly 🤖 (@sonyasupposedly) April 8, 2021
you *do* know that it could be genetic, right?
not in your case specifically, but you do recognize that some people's brains are not programmed to work properly?
People already find mild stimulants and antidepressants to be somehow uncanny. Total balls to the wall deep wireheading as a technological praxis and a teleological final solution is kind of archetypally, almost Satanically terrifying
— meekaale 🥸🌋🍵🍉 (@meekaale) April 8, 2021
people are definitely repulsed by happiness ethics. I've had hundreds of in person conversations with lots of variants on happiness things, and if I'm not very very careful I hit repulsion fast
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) April 8, 2021
I've kind of learned the maze and know how to talk about how making people happy is good without triggering it, but I feel bad abusing it, so I just say that I think people being happy is a good thing openly
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) April 8, 2021
it would look a lot more like "finding your inner joy" "healing wounds" "natural energy within" etc. Talk about how the outside world has bad things, and how you naturally feel great and all you need is to access that good stuff and undo the bad modern world
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) April 8, 2021
I’ve gotten a bunch of messages about the genetic thing. There’s a huge difference between something being heritable and genetically determined. Heritable focuses on averages, doesn’t mean you can’t change it. And we don’t have any good evidence it’s genetically determined https://t.co/si1Ye9cfLq
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) April 8, 2021
- pulled from the threads above
Also with Buddhist stuff I think the main objection is like “but if I just feel good in that way then I won’t want to do anything” and then the advocate is like “no trust me you will still want to do good things for some reason”
— meekaale 🥸🌋🍵🍉 (@meekaale) April 8, 2021
totally, the "if you're happy you'll become a couch potato" is one of my least favorite memes. It's cruel (it's a toxic belief) and untrue and I try to tweet about it regularlyhttps://t.co/hNQn3WVzke
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) April 8, 2021
Yeah and its opposite is in some ways counterintuitive but deeply generative and cool. Also the thing where after good meditation my whole problem-structure of painful entanglement is just different, I’m free to ACTUALLY perform actions instead of nervous self-hatred
— meekaale 🥸🌋🍵🍉 (@meekaale) April 8, 2021
I think a better model is like going high up a mountain. Once up he been there you’ve paved the neural circuits and it’s way way easier to get back. But also you don’t have to spend all your time up there, it’s hard to and it can be a bit overwhelming if you do
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) April 18, 2021
And the main thing I want to convey is the mountain goes counter-intuitively, shockingly high. And I certainly don’t claim to have been anywhere near the top even when I’ve been the highest
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) April 18, 2021
Oh and also that almost no one makes up super far up the mountain by accident. Just like no one randomly strolling by Everest in jeans accidentally summits it
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) April 18, 2021
It takes good prep, understanding of what previous mountaineers have learned, good health, and equipment
36. This is analogous to being able to inject happiness (or any other feeling) whenever you want on the spot in seconds. Which almost no one knows is possible, and doesn't sound like it should be possible. imo sounds preferable to most marvel superpowers to me
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) December 16, 2021
51. It's also fascinating injecting sukha into your experience as you're around someone and watching how they respond. You can see them just become more happy too, even if you don't tell them what you're doing. We're a social species. Learning to be happy is altruistic
— Nick Cammarata (@nickcammarata) December 16, 2021
Articles
https://qualiacomputing.com/2016/11/19/the-tyranny-of-the-intentional-object/
- direct realist vs representative/ indirect realist perspectives on the world and pleasure/ pain
- argues for ‘paradise engineering’
https://www.wireheading.com/hypermotivation.html
Decoding the human genome - and soon the proteome and transcriptome - opens up technical possibilities it would be unethical to ignore in a viciously pain-ridden world. For we can potentially amplify, modulate and redesign the architecture of our own neural reward mechanisms. Unlike our bodily thermostat, which can operate only within a narrow temperature range, the homeostatic mechanisms that govern human emotion and motivation can be radically recalibrated. Recalibrating the pleasure-pain axis may endow us with a far higher emotional “set-point” around which to oscillate than the dismal Darwinian norm.
Avoidance of crude pleasure-maximising interventions is prudent because uniform happiness is no more educative or illuminating than uniform despair. A wholly emotionally stable subject - and in theory an entire emotionally stable civilisation - could get “stuck in a rut”, whether that “rut” is a slough of despond or a globally sub-optimal plateau of bliss. But learning and personal development based on gradients of well-being can be both educative and powerfully motivating. A life animated by gradients of well-being is also personally more soul-enriching than learning based on gradients of pain.
On this scenario, bad hair days in any future post-Darwinian era of paradise-engineering may be merely wonderful rather than sublime. Hedonic adaptation of a sort may persist. Centuries hence, the computational-functional analogs of traditional “painful lessons” will survive, but not their cruel Darwinian textures. Indeed the homeostatic baseline of even our own (un)happiness could potentially be reset at a level of sustainable well-being orders of magnitude higher than the norm adaptive for small social groups of naked apes on the African savannah.
- very happy people find life inherently meaningful - meaning ‘built into’ the universe and is pervasive (interesting - direct realism of meaning?) - intellectual refutations of that simply aren’t impactful
Today, meanwhile, many people find it hard to get out of bed in the morning. Given the prevalence of chronic dysthymia, anhedonia and low-grade depression in even the “well” population at large, such inertia is scarcely surprising. Why bother to exert oneself if the subjective payoff is so meagre? Depressive and unmotivated people are likely to find life “meaningless”, “absurd”, “futile”. Nihilistic thoughts and angst-ridden mindsets are common. Feelings of inadequacy and failure can haunt the ostensibly successful. And the world is full of walking wounded whose spirit has been crushed.
Conversely (and for evolutionary reasons, less commonly), hyperthymic or euphorically hypomanic people tend to find life intensely meaningful. A heightened sense of significance is part of the texture of their lives. If our happiness is taken care of - whether genetically, pharmacologically, or electrosurgically - then the meaning of life seems to take care of itself.
Depressives, philosophers and hard-nosed scientists may respond that “the meaning of life” is cognitively meaningless, a verbal placebo empty of propositional content. Happy and hypermotivated people, on the other hand, find the meaning of life self-intimating, written into the texture of the(ir) world.
- very happy people find life inherently meaningful - meaning ‘built into’ the universe and is pervasive (interesting - direct realism of meaning?) - intellectual refutations of that simply aren’t impactful
https://www.superhappiness.com/
- a well-reasoned FAQ on increasing wellbeing & happiness by magnitudes
Related To:
Created On: 2020-11-18 from C - Awakening From the Meaning Crisis
Last Updated On: 2021-08-22